What happens in Vegas…

Shows up as a little bundle of joy 9 months later!

In typical Turner fashion we decided to go all out and do our honeymoon, Vegas style! But like all things we plan, it didn’t go completely as planned.

Things started off on a downward spiral when we got the pleasure of sitting in front of Lady Gemini. LG and her grandson were those people on the plane that you don’t want to get stuck in front of. The kid was a kicker and the woman just didn’t give a rat’s ass. She would nag for a moment, when Jess would turn around and give her the stink eye, but then she’d go back to being annoyingly absent from her son’s annoying behavior. But eventually we made it to Vegas!

We got our bags and headed off to our amazing hotel. I have a connection at work that got me a pretty awesome rate the Aria hotel. This hotel was amazing! There is a nifty little touch panel gizmo that you can use to control virtually every thing in the room. After a laborious check in process that put us to the limit we finally got to our room. The time difference had started to catch up with us and we were pooped. We grabbed a quick bite at one of the hotel restaurants then called it a night. We needed to rest up, for the Grand Canyon the next day!

I had only ever seen the Grand Canyon from the air, and I’ll tell you now, it does it no justice at all. On Thursday morning we got up bright and early and after having no luck finding coffee (apparently they don’t have coffee shops in the hotel open at 4:30am) we boarded our shuttle to airport. We got all checked in and boarded a tiny 15 person plane that would take us right up to the edge of the canyon. I was in awe the whole way over. I had never been this close to something so amazing (well, my wife is that close to me every day, but this was something else). Jess does NOT like to fly so she was happy to be back on the ground again. We had several hours to wander around and get photos, and boy did we make use of that time. We got all kinds of great shots and just took it all in. The Grand Canyon is just that… Grand. It’s bigger than big. You really have to see it in person to appreciate how wonderful of a place it is. Eventually the tour came to an end and we boarded the tiny plane back to the airport, where the shuttle would take us back to the hotel.

We had made reservations to eat at Bobby Flay’s restaurant, Mesa Grill for the second night we were there. After the canyon tour we rested up a bit then got ready and headed down to Cesar’s Palace. I had been there before, but this was Jess’ first time. We took the opportunity to walk past the Bellagio fountains and get hounded by those guys giving out cards for lady’s to spend the evening with. We saw people in costumes ranging from Home Simpson to Freddy Kruger. It was a mad house… it was Vegas! The restaurant was amazing. The food was fantastic and I loved every thing. We both got something we had never had before and sampled a little of each other’s dishes. It was a wonderful evening. Just me and my wife enjoying a fabulous dinner.

After dinner we walked back to the hotel where we did what must be done in Vegas, we gambled. We didn’t go all out and spend our life savings, but we had a good time. Our game of choice was roulette. Jess had a system and it usually paid off for us. Even now and then someone would come by and bring us a drink, but really we were just there to have fun. And fun we had.

The next day we just wanted to walk around and see the town. We made it about 1/3 down the stip, but it’s all good cause I’m sure we’ll be back. Around lunch we found Diablo’s cantina where the salsa was as hot as the view. A few hours and a few beers later we decided to walk around and do a tad more gambling. Again we were hounded by the guys and their clicking lady cards. Btw, that’s going to be my costume this Halloween. Friday night was just spend chilling at the hotel. Nothing fancy, no clubbin’ or extravagant dinner plans. Just my wife and I enjoying our honeymoon.

Saturday was pool day. We new we wanted to just spend a day relaxing by the pool not doing a damn thing. So we got up, got our suits on and headed out. We were lucky enough to get a good spot that was close enough to the water but far enough away from the chirlins’. Again, typical Sniper style, we decided to follow the norm and didn’t put on a lick of sunscreen. You would think that we would have learned our lesson from El Salvador, but we didn’t. I got some wicked sunburn on my leg and upper body, but SJ was pretty much in the clear.

Saturday night was Cirque du Soleil. SJ had wanted to see Zumanity and I wanted to see Ka, but also Zumanity. We found some discount tickets to Z and while we were walking to the show were literally handed 2 tickets to see Ka. Only in Vegas will you be given or win something for doing hardly nothing! We ended up going to Zumanity, and damn… that show was unbelievable. There were so many things right about that show. I can’t really give a lot of detail, but let’s just say that ladys on ladys and whips, and water, and midgets, and ropes, and water, and a drag queen, and everything! I am SO glad we went to that instead of Ka.

After the show, we grabbed a quick bite to eat then back to the hotel. The next day we leaving so we didn’t want to go balls out. Well, that plan didn’t really happen either. We got a late check out since our flight was a red eye. In order to pass the time we hit up the buffet (crab legs and pizza and roast and and omelet and bacon and pecan pie for “breakfast”, yes please) then just kinda farted around a bit. To prep for the flight we busted it out at Diablo’s again. This time we had our game faces on and the drinks were a bit more flowy. It helped that it was happy hour when we got there. So once it was time, we found our luggage, cabbed it up and headed to the airport where we partook in a few more drinks. Jess decided it would be a great idea to spill an entire glass of whiskey on my crotch just before boarding. I had a different view of that, but it’s all good.

We were both dreading the flight back. Neither of us are really known for sleeping on planes and we knew that boarding a flight at 11:45pm Vegas time and landing at 6am Atlanta time could only go poorly. However, to both of our surprise, once we got on there, we both passed the hell out. Maybe it was the lack of sleep in the past 24 hours, the non-stop movement of Vegas, the 7 hours of adult bevys, but I have no recollection of that flight. We sat down, took off and the next thing I knew we were landing. Just sheer joy to be home.

So that was that. Our Vegas honeymoon. We did everything we set out to do and more. We have pictures, memories, and a baby on the way. What more could I possibly ask for. Our vacations always seem to go awry in some way, shape, or form, but they always end up amazing. I love my wife and love the time I got to spend with her. It was a wonderful experience and I can’t wait for our next adventure!

The pics:
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More pics coming soon…

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